


Out of reach

by SweetHeaven



Category: Free!
Genre: M/M, OOCness, Pining, Sci-fiish AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-02
Updated: 2020-08-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:47:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,982
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25666915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SweetHeaven/pseuds/SweetHeaven
Summary: Rin is a young cyborg forced to work for a man he hates to pay a family debt. The only joy in his life is Haruka Nanase, the quiet servant of a rich family. Being just friends with him is more than enough for Rin, until a handsome, wealthy man takes an unexpected interest in Haruka.
Relationships: Matsuoka Rin/Nanase Haruka, Nanase Haruka/Albert Wåhlander
Comments: 26
Kudos: 39
Collections: #ficwip 5k





	Out of reach

**Author's Note:**

> This is my entry for the ficwip 5k challenge. Thanks so much to the organizers/mods!
> 
> Thanks to Jakota for beta-reading on such short notice. Any mistakes are entirely mine.
> 
> Thanks to my dear fellow snail Riri1342 for her continuous encouragement. Strong (but slow)!
> 
> Working with a word limit was hard, and I'm not completely satisfied with the final outcome, but it was very fun to try and stick to the limit!
> 
> Since this world doesn't exist, I made up a couple of words. Grucks is the currency they use and di'hal is a beautiful mineral.

"What do you mean, ten grucks? This crap is not even worth two!" a strong voice boomed from the other side of the ragged curtain.

"You heard me, ten grucks. If you don't like it, ask somewhere else, but good luck with finding one!" another voice scoffed. It was Kida, the shop owner.

From his spot at the workshop in the backroom, Rin rolled his human eye, tired of his boss' manners, but he didn't stop working.

He heard the bell over the door, signalling the arrival of another customer.

"Rin! Bring your hybrid ass here! Now!" Kida shouted before resuming his argument with the other man.

Rin sighed. He didn't like dealing with customers, he very much preferred working in the backroom, fixing and creating devices. He was good with gadgets, not with people.

He dragged his feet to the shop area, already looking forward to going back in his workshop.

When he got to the counter, though, his mood brightened immediately at the sight of the new customer.

Haruka Nanase. Kind, smart, funny and handsome. The most beautiful eyes Rin had ever seen. Oh, and Rin's secret crush.

"Good morning, Rin," Haruka greeted with a slight bow.

"Good morning, Haru!" Rin replied cheerfully.

"You seem to be in a good mood today," Haruka said.

_ 'It's all because of you,' _ Rin wanted to say.

"Well, it's always nice to see a customer come back, that means they are satisfied!" he said instead, his hands on his hips, acting proud.

The right corner of Haruka's lips curled slightly upwards. He usually was so stoic and expressionless, so Rin felt secretly pleased to know that he had _almost_ made him smile.

"What can I do for you today?" Rin finally asked, not because he wanted to get rid of Haruka soon, but because he felt so pathetic for having his heart doing somersaults at the mere sight of a barely-there smile.

Rin was head over heels for Haruka, but he knew he didn't have a single chance with him.

For one, Haruka was a servant in the Shigino household. He was not free to marry whoever he wanted. And even if he was, he wouldn't choose Rin. None in their right mind would marry a cyborg, especially not one as noticeable as Rin.

Someone as beautiful as Haruka shouldn't go hand in hand with a man whose face was basically split in two.

"I came to pick up my master's ray gun. You said it'd be ready today," Haruka replied.

"Ah, yes! I have it right here!" Rin said, opening a sideboard and taking out the gun. "Do you want me to explain what I did so that you can tell him?" he asked, excitement dripping from his voice.

Rin was the best repairman in town and many people, even the richest, took every kind of device for him to fix and improve. It was partly because he had a natural talent and a privileged brain for design, and partly because his robotic arm allowed him to do a more accurate work than any human hand could ever do.

He didn't think he was arrogant, but he was proud of his abilities, and somewhere in the back of his mind, he hoped he could impress Haruka with them.

"Sure," Haruka said softly, and that tiny promise of a smile was there again.

Rin grinned and proceeded to explain all the ingenious features he had added to the gun.

"This is very impressive, Rin," Haruka said, and Rin didn't know if he really meant it or he was just being polite, but he felt his cheek heat up. "How much is it?"

"Four hundred grucks," Rin replied, rubbing his neck. Charging customers made him uncomfortable because he never knew if they would start shouting at him like the man before. He knew Kida's prices were high.

"Ok," Haruka said, taking the grucks from his wallet without batting an eyelid. It was obvious he was used to handling a lot of money when running errands for his master. "I have to hurry now," he said with an apologetic look. "The Wåhlanders are visiting the villa this afternoon and my master is looking forward to showing them his gun collection."

Rin arched his eyebrows in surprise. The Wåhlanders were one of the richest and most powerful families in the country, and a visit from them was a big event for any family.

He whistled, impressed. The sound came out as a distorted 'beep', and he cut it abruptly, feeling ashamed and self-conscious.

"Um, ok, see you next time, I guess?" he said, trying to play it cool.

"Yes. See you soon," Haruka waved him goodbye.

_ 'Next time I'll ask him out on a date,' _ Rin thought for the thousandth time since the day he had met Haruka, just before the familiar fear of rejection clawed at his heart again, reminding him that he shouldn't aim that high, that Haruka was just too good for him.

.

.

.

Rin laid down in bed late at night, exhausted. It had been a long day.

He took a small notebook and a pen from the nightstand and added the number of grucks he would have earned that day to an already-too-long list.

He was _so close_ to finally pay his family debt, and then he would get a proper salary and he would be able to start saving to buy Haruka's freedom.

A long time ago, Kida had left for a week, leaving Rin in charge of the shop.

The last day, Haruka had been there to buy some parts for one of the cook androids and Rin had been whining about how much he disliked the work Kida had ordered him to do.

_ 'Well, you'll only have to do it until you pay your family's debt,' _ Haruka had said. _'Then, you can lead the life you want. You may not like the job you have to do, but… at least you are free…'_

Rin would never forget the longing and the sadness in Haruka's eyes. He knew that servants didn't have a bad life. Slavery had been left behind a long time ago, and serving at a house was not that different from any other job.

Except for the fact that servants belonged to someone else. Haruka was not the owner of his own life.

Servants were not allowed to own a house, or to marry the person they loved without the approval of their master. They were not allowed to wear as they pleased, or to travel wherever they wanted.

The only way out of serfdom was buying your freedom, but very few rich people were willing to let their servants go.

The number of servants they had was an indicator of their status, so they used to set very high prices, just to make sure that the extremely meagre salary servants perceived would never be enough.

Rin had felt like a total asshole for complaining about his situation when Haruka's was much worse.

That day, he had sworn to himself that he would find a way to pay for Haruka's freedom.

Of course, he didn't expect Haruka to return or even accept his feelings just in appreciation for his actions. Being friends with him was more than enough.

He just wanted Haruka to be free.

.

.

.

"Who the hell is that?" Rin asked, cleaning his hands with a rag.

He had spent the morning at the Shigino villa to carry out the spaceship maintenance when he saw Haruka walking around the patio with a tall, young man.

Rin hadn't seen his friend in the last three weeks, since he had gone to pick up the ray gun, and he had hoped to have the chance to chat with him a bit.

"Ah, that's Albert Wåhlander," Makoto, the villa's gardener, replied while he pruned a bush.

"I didn't know the Wåhlanders were still staying here…" Rin frowned.

"They aren't. They only stayed for a couple of days," Makoto explained. Then, lowering his voice to a conspiratorial tone, he added, "The young Wåhlander came back to visit…"

"Uh? Again? Why would he do that? I thought their visits were such a big event because they are rare…" Rin asked, confused.

"To close some business deal, I think," Makoto shrugged. "What I don't know is _why_ he's with Haru now…. But Asahi told me something happened when the Wåhlanders visited the villa. He didn't know many details, but… Well, you know that Haru likes sneaking into the swimming pool at night when everyone is asleep, right?"

Rin nodded. Haruka's love for swimming was one of the things that had made Rin interested in him in the first place. Rin used to love swimming too when he was a kid, before the accident. He would have asked Haruka to race him if his circuits were water-proof.

"Apparently, the young Wåhlander enjoys swimming too, and he decided to have a swim in the middle of the night. It seems that he caught Haru, and, even though he knew he was one of the servants, he was fine with sharing the pool. He even raced him!"

Rin grimaced. He didn't like where the story was going.

"Ok, but that doesn't explain why he's strolling with Haru right now?" he pressed.

"Rumour has it that he became completely smitten with him after seeing him swim. In fact, he didn't tell anyone he had found a servant in the pool so that he wouldn't cause trouble for Haru."

"Then how does Asahi knows what happened?" Rin asked, hoping that it was just some baseless gossip.

"When he was doing his nightly rounds to check that everything was in order, he noticed that Wåhlander wasn't in his room. He got worried and went to look for him. When he searched the swimming pool, he saw him talking to Haru. He asked Haru about it the following morning and he explained what had happened."

"And Haru said that Wåhlander dude was smitten with him?" Rin gasped. Such an observation didn't suit Haru at all.

"Of course not!" Makoto laughed. "But Asahi said that one of the servants had told him that Wåhlander had asked her about Haru. She said he seemed very interested."

Rin lowered his head. The only good thing about Haru not being allowed to get married was that he didn't have any suitors and Rin didn't have to worry about competition.

"Don't worry, Rin," Makoto placed a hand on his shoulder. "Haru wouldn't let himself be wooed by the first rich person who asks him to have a walk around the house."

"I guess you're right," Rin sighed. "Besides, none in the Wåhlander family would seriously consider the idea of marrying a servant," he said, regaining his confidence.

"Exactly," Makoto smiled. "Now you just need to muster up the courage to ask him out. Don't worry about that man. I'm sure he's here just for business."

.

.

.

Five weeks had passed since Rin's conversation with Makoto, and his friend's words kept replaying in his head.

_ 'You need to muster up the courage to ask him on a date. Don't worry about that man.' _

Rin knew that Makoto was right, now more than ever. He had always been finding excuses to hide behind instead of facing his insecurities.

Sure, Haruka couldn't get married without permission, but that didn't mean that Rin was not allowed to confess and to court him. Rin had just convinced himself that it was pointless.

But after the gut-clenching fear he had experienced when he had seen Haruka with Albert Wåhlander and Makoto had mentioned that maybe that man had taken a liking to Haruka, he had understood he had to do _something_.

And that's how he found himself visiting the Shigino villa, ready to confess his feelings and to give Haruka a gift.

Not too long after they had met, Haruka had mentioned that his hometown was famous for its scarce di'hal mines, that couldn't be found in any other planet. Di'hal was a very rare mineral, mostly known for its beautiful blue colour.

_ 'Just like your eyes,' _ Rin had thought back then.

Di'hal was very expensive, and any jewels made of it were very valuable.

Buying something like that was completely out of Rin's reach. Even if he didn't have to worry about his debt, it still would be impossible.

However, that didn't mean that he couldn't try to give Haruka something that reminded him of di'hal.

Rin had spent months working on a bracelet made of a special alloy that was hard to get unless you had the right contacts. Thankfully, Kida was too lazy to check the orders Rin made to their supplier...

He had worked on it every time he had a free minute to create an intricate pattern that he had carefully designed to mimic the image of sea waves against the rocks.

Afterwards, he had inserted a very complex set of circuits that created a light with the exact hue of di'hal.

It had been an arduous task. It had even been a bit dangerous, since the circuits were so small that Rin, despite his expertise, had accidentally damaged the point of his mechanic finger when he was welding them together —not that he was planning to tell Haruka such a thing, of course.

He knew the bracelet was not valuable, but he was proud that he had made it with his own hands to show Haruka how much he cared.

The problem was that, until now, he hadn't had the courage to give it to him.

He could only hope that Haruka would like it.

He crossed the main gate of the estate at a quick pace and asked about Haruka's whereabouts to Ai, the domestic android in charge of organizing the daily chores, who told him Haruka was at the stables.

Rin smiled to himself. He knew Haruka loved horses and the stable chores were among his favourites. Not many people had horses nowadays. Who needed a horse when they had spaceships that could take them to any part of the galaxy at the speed of light? Still, some families liked to keep them as an exquisite rarity.

Haruka took care of them as lovingly as if the animals were his, and Rin loved that about him.

He headed for the back of the building, playing with the bracelet nervously. The touch of the polished surface felt reassuring against the skin of his trembling human fingers.

He could do this. He would look Haruka in the eye and would say, 'Haru, I love you. I have loved you since th-'

His fantasy was interrupted by the unexpected sight in front of him.

As Ai had informed him, Haruka was, indeed, at the stable. But he wasn't alone.

To Rin's horror, Wåhlander was with him, holding Haruka's hand in such a confident way that one would say he considered it belonged to him.

His smile was dazzling and he was so handsome, way more handsome than Rin.

However, knowing that his competition was such an attractive man was not the worst.

What shattered Rin's heart into pieces was seeing Haruka's face. Rin had been around Haruka many times and he had seen him interact with many people in many situations, but his face rarely showed his emotions. That didn't mean that he was a cold person, just that he was not very expressive. Even Rin, with his half-face, was easier to read.

Rin had always prided himself on being able to make Haruka smile in situations when none else did. Maybe it was not a wide grin, but it was an honest smile, after all.

He had always assumed, surely out of vanity, that none else could make Haruka smile like that.

Yet there Haruka was, a soft beam adorning his lips while he looked at Albert Wåhlander as if he was the most wonderful creature in the world. Rin had never seen Haruka showing that face before, not even to him.

He took a step back, ready to leave before being noticed, but Haruka looked his way.

"Rin," he greeted with a very slight wave of his free hand.

"He-hello," Rin stuttered, stopping himself just in time when he was about to wave back and sway the bracelet in front of Haruka's face. He hid it quickly behind his back, choosing to hold it in his robotic hand. He suddenly didn't feel like touching it with his real skin.

"What are you doing here? I thought you wouldn't come to carry out any maintenance until next week," Haruka frowned.

The tiny part of Rin's heart that was not crushed already swelled slightly at the idea of Haruka knowing when he was supposed to visit the villa.

_ 'It's a shame that it means nothing,' _ he thought.

"Ah, yes, yes. I just came to look for a tool I think I forgot here last time," he lied. "I heard you were here and came to say hi," he tried to act nonchalant, not knowing how to explain why he was in the stables when the hangar was at the other side of the estate.

"That's so kind of you," Haruka smiled. "Oh, look. I want to introduce you to someone," he said gesturing to Albert to come near while Rin thought that he would much prefer to be hit by a lightning bolt and killed right that instant rather than meeting that man, thank you very much.

"Nice to meet you," Albert held out his hand to greet him. His voice was like velvet, so different from Rin's with its metallic ring that so many people seemed to find ridiculous.

"Likewise," Rin replied politely, trying not to talk too much. "I'm sorry I can't stay and chat, I have to go back soon or Kida will go crazy," he explained.

"Oh, sure," Haruka said, and Rin had the impression that he seemed disappointed.

"Goodbye," he said, feeling that the weight the word carried was heavier than ever, and walked away as fast as he could.

When he returned to the shop, he threw the bracelet into a drawer under the counter.

He might be able to sell it for a good price and give the money to Kida to help with his debt. 

.

.

.

"I don't understand why you're still hesitating," Sousuke's voice sounded distorted and his hologram figure kept fading and reappearing. "Your debt is almost settled and Makoto told me Nanase is leaving to get married to Wåhlander. There's nothing left for you in that place, and here we need someone with your skills."

"I know, Sou," Rin sighed. Sousuke, his best friend from childhood, had been pestering him to join him in the team in charge of the government official fleet for years, and now Rin had no reason to refuse.

At first, it was the debt. Then, it was the fact that he didn't want to leave the village where Haruka lived. But he would be free from Kida in a few weeks, and Haruka was marrying Wåhlander.

He still remembered the shock he felt when Makoto told him. And then, nothing. He couldn't feel a thing. He was numb since then. And just like Sousuke has pointed out, he had no reason to stay.

"Then?" Sousuke pressed. "Are you coming or not?"

Rin closed his eyes and considered it for a second.

"I am," he finally said.

.

.

.

It was almost closing time and Rin was bored out of his mind. Kida had left him in charge of the shop, again, and time seemed to go by so slowly.

Thankfully, he would only have to do that job for one more week. Then, his family's debt would finally be paid and he wouldn't have to set foot in that place again.

He was sweeping the floor for the umpteenth time just to keep himself busy, wondering if Kida would notice if he closed a bit earlier, when the bell rang.

_ 'The last customer of the day, hopefully,' _ he thought.

He turned to welcome them, and he almost dropped the broom when he saw who it was.

He hadn't talked to Haruka since that day at the stable, a lifetime ago. At most, they had exchanged greetings if they happened to run into each other when Rin was doing some work at the villa.

"Haruka," he greeted while he walked behind the counter. The physical barrier between them smoothed his nerves slightly. "How can I help you?"

"Sorry, I'm not buying anything today," Haruka stated simply, looking around. Was he looking for Kida?

"Oh…Ok?" Rin replied, not knowing what to say.

"I've heard you're leaving," Haruka said, examining one of the display cases.

"I've heard the same about you," Rin replied ambiguously. He didn't know why he was playing a 'neither confirm nor deny' game. What did Haruka care, anyway?

"I'm… not," Haruka said with a slight frown. "Not for now, at least," he added, still averting Rin's eyes.

"Does Albert Wåhlander have a house here? I bet he can afford one in each village" Rin said, not bothering to hide the bitterness in his voice.

Haruka looked at Rin for the first time.

"Not yet. He'd like to buy one, though," he replied, scrutinizing Rin's face.

"What?" Rin spat. He didn't like it when people looked at him for too long. It used to be different with Haruka, but now, it made him feel worse than any look he had ever got, even the disgusted ones.

"Why are you angry?" Haruka frowned.

"Who says I am?" Rin countered.

"Your body language, the tone of your voice, your words, and, most of all, the fact that you haven't come to talk to me in the villa at all…" Haruka pretended to count with his fingers. Rin didn't know if he was trying to be playful.

"… I have work to do," was his only answer before turning around and get into the workshop.

"I thought you would be happy for me, but I guess I was wrong," Haruka's murmured words made him stop on his tracks.

"What did you just say?" Rin turned to Haruka again narrowing his eyes.

Haruka gulped but held Rin's gaze.

"You just made it clear that you had heard about Albert. I thought if someone was happy for me to finally get my freedom, it would be you," Haruka explained. Somehow, he sounded _hurt_.

"You think I'm not happy that you get to be free?" Rin asked in disbelief. How could Haruka think something like that?

"You… you don't seem happy…" Haruka whispered. "You always understood what it meant to be trapped in a life you don't want. I thought we were the same, in some way. And now we'll both be free and I'm so happy for you, but you just…"

"I'm happy that you'll be free. Congratulations," Rin cut him, crossing his arms defensively.

"Please, don't say it if you don't mean it…" Haruka sighed.

Rin sighed in turn.

"What do you want from me, Haruka?" he rubbed his face.

"You may not remember, but a long time ago, you said that if I ever got free, we would go to celebrate," Haruka started.

Yes, Rin remembered that conversation very well. He had envisioned the scene many times in his head, with him arriving at the Shiginos' with a bag full of cash announcing Haruka that he was going to set him free. Obviously, he was not going to explain that to Haruka now.

"I think I remember something like that, yes," he nodded.

"Makoto said he told you about Albert buying my freedom and I was surprised that you didn't come to celebrate with me," Haruka continued. "I know it will sound weird to you, but you were the person I was looking forward to sharing this with the most. And I really need to know why you haven't said anything about it."

Rin couldn't understand why this was so important to Haruka, but he supposed he could give him at least a fake explanation.

"I've been busy and…" he started.

"Don't lie…" Haruka pleaded.

"I'm not lying!" Rin raised his voice. He was furious now. Who was Haruka to question him, to begin with?

"Just tell me the truth, Rin!" Haruka shouted unexpectedly. There was fire in his eyes.

Rin had never heard him speak like that. He didn't like it.

He just wanted to be left alone.

"Ok, fine!" he shouted even louder.

He opened the drawer, took out the bracelet and slammed it against the counter.

The ugly sound it made when it hit the hard surface shut them both at once.

An awkward silence settled between them.

"Wha… what is this?" Haruka asked in awe, his eyes not leaving the piece that was still clattering against the counter.

"It was supposed to be a gift for you," Rin replied, defeated. There was no point in hiding it anymore.

Haruka's eyebrows almost met his hairline.

_ 'Oh, I made him show a new expression,' _ Rin thought sadly.

"But why would you…?" Haruka started, his voice trembling.

"Ugh, isn't it obvious? Because I love you!" Rin threw his arms in the air in desperation.

Haruka wouldn't have looked more shocked if Rin had hit him with a hammer.

"Why didn't you say anything?" he asked softly after a while.

"Because I wanted to tell you when I had enough money to buy your freedom. It was just a stupid dream. You found a wonderful man that not only loves you, but also has enough money to give you what you want the most," he lowered his head. "I can't even afford to buy you a real jewel…" his voice broke while he brushed his real fingers against the bracelet.

"Oh, Rin," Haruka said, covering Rin's hand with his own. "I'm sorry. I just can't…"

"Don't be sorry. It's not your fault. We were just not meant to be," Rin made a strangled noise and focused on enjoying the touch of Haruka's skin on his, knowing that the gentle gesture meant goodbye.

In a way, he felt relieved that he had had the chance to confess before leaving.

"I have to go now," Haruka said, pressing Rin's hand slightly before breaking their contact.

"Ok," Rin said weakly, already missing Haruka's proximity.

"So… this is goodbye," Haruka looked away. It wasn't even a question.

Rin knew it was for the best, that postponing their final goodbye was a terrible idea. And yet…

"I'll have to go to the estate to say goodbye to the others before leaving. I'll see you then," he promised.

The way Haruka's eyes lightened up at his words was worth the pain.

.

.

.

Rin parked his old ship at the estate gate and went to look for Haruka. He found him cleaning the pool.

"Haru," he called.

Haruka raised his head and waved at him. "You came," he smiled.

"I promised I would," Rin shrugged as if being there was not breaking his heart again.

"I didn't get the chance to congratulate you on paying your debt to Kida and finding a new job. I'm happy for you," Haruka said. Truth be told, he didn't seem that happy.

"Thank you, it's exciting to start a new life, but you already know that, right?" Rin said. He had no idea when Haruka was supposed to leave with Albert.

"I'm a bit sad, too," Haruka said, ignoring Rin's remark. "Things will be boring without you around," he looked into the distance.

"Well, you'll be leaving soon, too."

"I won't," Haruka said unexpectedly, looking directly at him.

Rin felt dizzy for a second and he wondered if some part of him was short-circuiting.

"I told Albert not to buy my freedom. I couldn't accept it," Haruka said.

"Haru! Why would you do that?!" Rin asked, shocked. How did that make any sense?

"I didn't want to marry him, and I didn't want to feel I'd owe it to him if he set me free," Haruka shrugged as if it wasn't a big deal when actually it was huge. Haruka had his freedom so _damn_ close.

"But why wouldn't you want to marry him?" Rin asked, even though he knew it might be rude to pose such a personal question. He just _needed_ to know.

"He's a good person, and I enjoy his company," Haruka smiled fondly, "but I'm not in love with him," he finished, fixing his eyes on Rin's.

"…uh?" Rin was still confused.

Haruka laughed softly at his expression. Mesmerised by the sound, Rin barely registered the moment Haruka's hand found his.

"I was… fascinated by him," Haruka started. "We clicked, and I misunderstood my feelings because I didn't know what it felt like to be in love. Or, well, I _thought_ I didn't know," he rubbed his thumb against the back of Rin's hand.

"Haru…" Rin whispered, afraid that speaking too loud would break the spell.

"After you confessed that day, I... I realised I would miss Albert if he was gone, like I would miss any friend, but I wasn't able to even _imagine_ my life without you. I didn't want a life that you're not part of, I didn't care if I was a servant or not. I'll always choose a life with you in it, even if I'm a servant forever," Haruka said, his voice rough with emotion.

"Haru… I have nothing to offer to you," Rin croaked.

"You have yourself, and that's the only thing I want," Haruka caressed Rin's cheek and brought his face closer.

Rin leaned into the touch.

"I've never kissed a cyborg," Haruka murmured.

"I've never kissed a human," Rin laughed before closing the gap between them.

They would manage to build a new life somehow, no matter how long it might take.

Everything would be alright, Rin just knew it.

After all, they had each other.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much for reading until the end :)


End file.
